sea lion

christians...or whatever title you want to give yourself

we have to realize, we live in the world.

i mean its something said over again probably

maybe

sometimes (me included) i think we choose to be naive to the things in this world. we would rather be starry eyed followers of Jesus then people who know whats going on and get involved.
there are things running/ruining our world. and unless we get inbloved in decisions being made (goverment) bla bla bla

the thing is we need to not do things half ass. in a lot of things..God gave us gifts...there are things that probably come naturally and things that may not so much but may be a passion. we need to practise those things. refine those things. become good at those things. and use them to further the kingdom

no sitting of our bums wondering why the world is going to hell.

its going to hell when we stand silent. and i guess i do that a lot. so now im learning.

get over your insecurities and do it. try it. be it. live it. learn it.

the end

disclaimer: heaps of what i said may be crap or not make sense. search through the crap and find some truth would ya?

tired today,

lack of sleep,

dreams so far away.

all i want to do

is rest my head

relax my weary bones.

my brain wont function

the way they say it should

the way they say it could.

but maybe the rights

are wrongs

the upsides

are downsides

and those things in you

are whats really in me

The Police

Im just going to take a little bit of time.

to just write

i dont know really what im going to write about

but i figure not a lot of people check this page anymore. so heck why not.

but you know when songs exhilarate you.

they just give you an energy in your bones.

i love it. i love that music can do that to you.

like the song "Dont stand so close to me" i didnt think it would be one of those songs

but we watched a Glee episode(yep i got sucked in)

and now whenever i listen to it im just like YEA IM IN A MUSICAL.

arts do that to ya. i mean thats nothing profound

im discovering more. about arts...and i love writing
sure i suck at spelling
and punctuation

but i love it.

its comfortable. epic.

sometimes i swear hicups are contagious. like right now i can hear a girl outside my door hicupping and i swear i can feel it rising up in me

a singular hicup

waitig to lurch out of my throat.

i hate hicups.

what are my other thoughts of the day...

sugar.

dont you hate it when you have to much and then your uber tired. but A D D at the same time?

i hate it.

but i love sugar

oh life is hard.

ha.

oh and today i was talking to a distant relative on FB and i found out that most of my line on my fathers side was Jewish and here close to me in Berlin is a Cemetary that my family set up with somthing like 100 thousand? Jews buried in it.

my family was killed in the war

they fleed from the war.

my history is here in Germany and so close to me in Poland.

its kind of crazy.

Another summer day
Is come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aerorplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
But this was not your dream
But you always believe in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
And even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
Oh, let go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home

well im leaving another home

MERRY CHRISTMAS and A HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!


Wow it’s been a crazy year…

I really don’t know how to sum it all up! But God sure has taken me on an adventure, if I stop and think about it its hard to believe that this has been my life. From being in beautiful Hawaii where God totally broke off all these things in my life that I had been holding on to that were really crippling me.
To Panama where I was so challenged in who I ‘thought’ God was what I thought missions was. He totally stripped off all these preconceptions and I had to start learning all over again. It really challenged me on how I lived out this life of missions. This made me realize that I couldnt put any box around what I thought living out my faith and love for God should look like that it had to be in everything I did that I express the love of God. Then to come to South Africa. To see poverty next to the rich. To see the destruction because of things like racism and prejudice but also to see these things in my own heart. It was really hard. A big part of that journey was relying on God for my needs. Also really seeing how I have to listen to him and talk with him about issues such as finances, and not just expect it to turn up. I was really shown a whole other level of intimacy God longs for. How he longs for me to discuss and make choices for him with him in him. After he challenged me where my heart was with staying on track or not, I decided that this is where I should be at this point in my life, even if it was hard and to be honest it would be so much easier to come home and a lot of me wanted to. He then provided the money I needed the day before the final due day of our finances. It was awesome.

So it been a journey. And im so glad I have been able to do it with you all. All your encouragements and prayers have been so good. Just knowing that I have people around the world who care and are passionate about these things that are on my heart is amazing. I am now going on to Cairo Egypt. Where I will be for 3 weeks and we will be doing an extensive study of the bible, we will be following the journey of Paul. We will continue into Israel, turkey…this will be an amazing experience, of course our ministry through photography will come into play. One of the things we want is to come into each different country with a true honor for their culture. So the correct dress etc. this will be very interesting when it comes to not looking men in the eyes when speaking to them and things like that. Another thing is that I wont be using facebook for the time that I am there. This is because of security issues and for the protection of people working their already. Also when it comes to talking about ministry and God or Jesus I will use other words such as father..or talking to my dad. So if you could all go along with that in any emails you send to me. Please don’t use any words like evangelism or missions etc.

It would be awesome if you could all send your email addresses to my email gold_fish_5@hotmail.com today is the last day I will be on facebook so please send them there asap.

Please keep me in your prayers. Money is still the issue at the back of my mind I have m next school fees coming up and im once again in the position of not having any money haha.

Much love and blessings

Naomi

a brand new world

So here I am standing in Africa. Breathing in its air. Letting the cold sink into my bones..

Starting a new section of my life.

Gone is the oppressive humidity of Panama

The jungle in my backyard, overflowing in every area of the city

New beginnings

New endings

New ideas

New loves

New difficulties

Here I go. I find it so hard to really write down what living this has been like. And what going into this next season is framed by..what is. Partly because im still asking God that myself.

You find out so much truth about yourself when you step into each new country, with each new truth of mans/womans frail existence glaring you in the face. Then you find out that all these issues that you are fighting against, are issues that lay within yourself. When you feel fear creep under your skin because of your own weakness. Your own judgments. These ugly truths within yourself.

These are things that I've had to grapple with…that I still am turning over and figuring out. I have to deal with these things within myself.

But one of my friends from my team shared this morning about what God has been doing within her, what revelation he has been bringing to her. And it struck me that these were the things that I have been tossing over myself. Wondering how I am going to use this photography for Gods kingdom. Knowing that there must be more then what I see just now.

I don’t want to be just another photographer that shows images of poor and broken people with no hope what so ever. Because the truth is, the thing that doesn’t make sense to the rich society, is these people already have hope…the have joy, they know how to laugh and love and share. I know we have all heard it before, from others who have seen this joy in some of the most harsh circumstance, through people who have next to nothing.

What I have come to realize is that these people don’t need our 'service' us helping them, they need us to serve them. To be there servants. Not to come as the rich to the poor, or to cure them of all there diseases, they need us to come on the level of humanity, a common ground.

As my friend was sharing this morning, I want my pictures to not make people look at a picture and take pity on these people, no, much more than that I want people to look at a picture and see two kingdoms colliding, and I want them to make a choice. Because you have to, you choose one or the other, people do it everyday. These people don’t need pity. We need to recognize, really, who is the rich, who is the poor.

I've stumbled along into a few different opportunities. Every Monday night we go to the nearby township(Capricorn) of 20,000 to 25,000 people, victims of the segregation 15years ago, we pray and worship there, kids join us, people wandering by stop to either join in or simply watch. Now on Tuesday's and Thursday's I go to a school just down the road from our house and I will be helping out with a film school with two other girls in my group. I'm not to sure what exactly they want us to do (im not exactly an expert on films) but I think they mainly want us to just help motivate the teenagers into what they are doing. Through this we also got an opportunity to possibly help out in a camp for the school- a lady there who leads a Christian group is eager to get some young faces in to show that Christianity can be "cool" as a teenager- haha- I don’t exactly think ill be the best face to represent that, but it will be an amazing opportunity to really challenge these girls and guys.

Also- time permitting I may be starting up a bible study with my friend Kristin within Capricorn- which would be awesome.
Amongst this I also have day to day school from 8-1 and then assignments every afternoon- so life is busy-but good.

Its weird. All these opportunities are great, but its crazy how apathy and fear creeps in. its been something I struggle with daily. One day im ready to change the world. The next its an effort to walk out the front door. I really want to know Gods heart for these people. I really want to know my heart -haha- that’s part of the journey.

SO .. Things I really could use prayer for
-MY prayer life
-money…im at $1000 I need $3400 USD more by the end of this month.
-That I keep pressing into God-I want my whole heart to be his.
-health-just in general but also for my arthritis that it doesn’t become an obstacle
-my relationship with everyone in the house.
-that I let this be a God thing and not a Naomi thing.

That’s it! So if you have got through this marathon update then CONGRADULATIONS

If you skipped to the end then…well fair enough haha

But love you all sorry this has taken its sweet time. And I appreciate all your prayer

Kisses and hugs

Breath in Panama Breath out South AFRICA?

LAST FEW DAYS

This part of the journey is coming to a close. And Im falling in love with this place, doesn’t mean Im not happy to leave, but I asked God to really soften my heart for this country and to see the beauty and how he loves it and he has. Well at least a lot more than I was to begin with. Even in the little things like telling a woman on the bus that God loves her was awesome. Seeing the greatness of God explode in my world, how he loves us to abandon ourself in his arms. And how abandonment can be amazing when you know your so safe with Him.

I’ve learnt so many things and am still learning so many things. Its made me think about ‘missions’ what they should look like- to be honest I don’t think I really enjoy that term missions anyway. I prefer being. Being with God. Although I knew this before, God just really kept reminding me, that missions is where ever we are. At home, overseas, at work, at a café. That our love for him should over flow… just in our being.

Let everything we do be done for a purpose.

THE THINGS MY EYES DID SEE

Broken women pleading for a way out of the lives they exist in. Pleading to do more than just exist.

Kids that are so happy but who are being born into a trap, a cycle, that just keeps churning round and round till someone says STOP.

I’ve seen churches cry as they realize that there are truths about their own country they never knew. People stirred and eager for action.

Tourists that only came for the beauty of the country, seeing, hearing ,tasting God.

Seeking.

Team mates, change, grow, stretch break- me-myself the same.

GOING GOING…STILL

Hmmmm God is taking me on an adventure for sure………For a few years now God has been speaking to me…I’d be walking down the street and something would shiver over me, and excitement, and incredible overwhelming creativity, that I never knew how to express or what to do with. I recognize now that Gods whisper was in that. He was telling me, hold on, theres more, Ive got something crazy for you.

He knows that’s what I need. Even when sometimes it scares me.

Its the beginning of something crazy wonderful an adventure of God and I.

Yep we love each other heaps.